alan7388 (alan7388) wrote in polyboston,

Polyamory in the News: a race to define ourselves

Politicians spend millions to define who they are to the public before their opponents can do it for them. The modern polyamory movement has been defining itself successfully with nothing but volunteers, enthusiasm, and a shoestring. When does the backlash start? I keep waiting for it, and year after year it keeps not happening.

If you haven't kept up with Polyamory in the News in the last three months (or subscribed to it by the LJ friends feed or some other service), here is some of what you missed:

  • Poly as a child-friendly way of life is explored at Momlogic, a big, mainstream parenting site: “For some, being polyamorous provides more love and support for the kids than does being in a monogamous household.” Bookmark this one for the next time someone asks, “But what about the kids?”

  • A slew of articles on open marriage, most of them friendly, hit the media in the weeks after Mo’Nique Imes-Hicks won an academy award.

  • Are we mainstream yet? “Canada's magazine celebrating women over 40” presents a sympathetic article on older, conventional couples and their friends exploring polyamory in later life. “Some believe this type of marriage has such broad appeal that over the next decade it will become accepted as a viable lifestyle choice.”

  • Along these lines, a National Public Radio station airs a half-hour discussion, “The Future of Marriage and Non-Traditional Relationships”, in which we come off as some kind of awesome.

  • All this suggests that we’re winning the race to define ourselves to the world... so far. To keep the momentum going, some of us have gotten involved in the Polyamory Leadership Network (see Anita Wagner’s account of its last meeting) and the Polyamory Media Association. If you’d like to start declaring your poly life and ideas effectively to the wide world, the PMA folks can help you become a star.

  • Speaking of learning to handle media people and their agendas, watch how this triad comes across on German TV (scroll down and click the second frame from the left). Never mind that it’s in German, the visuals say it all. These three knew what to do from the first phone call. You can learn how to come off this well too.

  • Of course, not everyone likes us. “Polyamory: Evil dressed as love,” writes a Tennessee preacher lady in her newspaper column. The race to define ourselves is still a race.

  • Details, a piggy men’s fashion mag, seems a bit awed and intimidated: “Five rules from the polyamorous for not screwing up”.

  • Wendy-O Matik is interviewed. The anarcho-punk author of Redefining Our Relationships (2002) says, “I’m beaming with enthusiasm and radical love inoculations, even after seven years of peddling polyamory workshops across the globe.”

  • More stuff: the Non-Monogamous Male Couples Study is out, after years of data collection.

  • The (successful) pansexual, polyamorous, BDSM law school application.

  • Poly jewelry, clothing, and other displays.

  • Polys vs. Swingers: staring down the stereotypes.

  • And in Britain, a spinoff magazine from The Economist approvingly quotes a professor of analytical psychology: “Polyamory is the fastest growing style of relationship.” And they’re actually talking about what we mean by it.

  • Plus poly news from Malaysia, China, Israel, and Ireland.

    So yes, I’d say we’re defining ourselves pretty well. Keep it up. The more people come to understand what we’re about, the better we’ll be able to ride out future witch hunts and moral panics. I’m beginning to think the window of opportunity for our opponents to organize such things is closing.


    Here's the site: Polyamory in the News ( The most recent 10 items are up front.

    Here's where to sign up for the LJ friends feed. Or subscribe by another feed.

    I've done 401 of these reports in the last five years. They're sorted in the archive by topic, date, and sometimes location and language. I hope you have as much fun browsing them as I do creating them!

    Happy springtime,


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